ties
I did not count on things to go this far. I had always known there was a rift but not as big as this. Why can't they leave things the way they are - leave us they way we are? Love is acceptance, after all, isn't it? and family, supposedly, is the epiphany of love, shouldn't it be?
why must they look at us like we're dirt? are we not human as well? unique and radiant. dynamic, and self-sustained... Are we not made by the same hand of the same God they adore and praise?(if they truly praise Him) Do they think they are more blessed than the people beneath there stature?
I have grown to know them as loving and caring, nurturing and God praising individuals - as my own have taught me. I think I was mistaken into thinking so - mislead by the cruel twist of reality.
Why does every real thing I grew to know become just another dream? Was it because I never knew or spoke their language? Was it because I never shared their taste? Or was it because I was born of a native?
I have been taught that every blood-line deserves its people's pride. Why, then, are they looking at this poor little brown person as if he were a scum that clings to their shoes? I guess they did not go to the same school I did. they were never taught the things I was.
Has sorrow been fated to be my soul mate? was all these things inevitable? I feel as though I am isolated. and everything I held dear was slipping away from my tightest grip. first the love I so longed for keeps eluding me, then my friends slipped away as easily as I counted to three, now my family has fallen as the glue that held us together fell with age. I don't think I can bear the loss of the brother I never had. my closest cousin. I never thought it would come to this. And to think that I never had the chance to let him know I loved him like my own brother.
they were right. they were the only ones who were real in this twisted truth. they were the only ones who did not dwell in my fantasies. they were, is, and will always be my wall... the pillar of my abode. they were they ones who saved me when I was suffocating, when I was in need...
I see the world through troubled eyes, now. I have seen truth through there lies. I have been freed. freed from the hesitation of being me.
they have given me wings to fly, but I never have been able too look long enough to recognize them until now. I will not go and tear my life apart... I can't... I love them too damn much... I hope they know this... I will not let them down even if I could...
why must they look at us like we're dirt? are we not human as well? unique and radiant. dynamic, and self-sustained... Are we not made by the same hand of the same God they adore and praise?(if they truly praise Him) Do they think they are more blessed than the people beneath there stature?
I have grown to know them as loving and caring, nurturing and God praising individuals - as my own have taught me. I think I was mistaken into thinking so - mislead by the cruel twist of reality.
Why does every real thing I grew to know become just another dream? Was it because I never knew or spoke their language? Was it because I never shared their taste? Or was it because I was born of a native?
I have been taught that every blood-line deserves its people's pride. Why, then, are they looking at this poor little brown person as if he were a scum that clings to their shoes? I guess they did not go to the same school I did. they were never taught the things I was.
Has sorrow been fated to be my soul mate? was all these things inevitable? I feel as though I am isolated. and everything I held dear was slipping away from my tightest grip. first the love I so longed for keeps eluding me, then my friends slipped away as easily as I counted to three, now my family has fallen as the glue that held us together fell with age. I don't think I can bear the loss of the brother I never had. my closest cousin. I never thought it would come to this. And to think that I never had the chance to let him know I loved him like my own brother.
they were right. they were the only ones who were real in this twisted truth. they were the only ones who did not dwell in my fantasies. they were, is, and will always be my wall... the pillar of my abode. they were they ones who saved me when I was suffocating, when I was in need...
I see the world through troubled eyes, now. I have seen truth through there lies. I have been freed. freed from the hesitation of being me.
they have given me wings to fly, but I never have been able too look long enough to recognize them until now. I will not go and tear my life apart... I can't... I love them too damn much... I hope they know this... I will not let them down even if I could...
posted by popi at 2:13 PM
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